Relationships and marriages
In
1919, as his career had yet to take off, Valentino married
Jean Acker. Acker was a bit actress who was mainly cast as a favor to her
lesbian lover
Alla Nazimova. The three had become friends and Valentino appeared to be oblivious to Acker's orientation. Acker was caught in a love triangle with
Grace Darmond and Nazimova; both of which threatened to destroy her career if she left either of them. Seeing a chance to escape unscathed, Acker married Valentino.
The marriage was never consummated, with Jean locking him out of their hotel suite on their first
honeymoon night. She later fled to Darmond's where Valentino pleaded with her to give him a chance to no avail. Instead of divorcing, the couple remained legally married until
1921, when he filed for divorce so he could marry
Natacha Rambova.
At the time, the divorce trial was caused a sensation due to Valentino's new star status. Valentino found it embarrassing to have to charge
desertion and Acker's refusal to consummate the marriage. The divorce was granted with a decent alimony going to Acker. Despite her antics and use of the name "Mrs. Valentino" (a name she had no legal right to), she and Valentino eventually renewed their friendship until his death. She made regular visits when he was on his death bed and was reportedly one of the last people he saw just before he died.
Valentino first met
Natacha Rambova, a costume designer and
art director who was a protégé of Nazimova, on the set of
Uncharted Seas in 1921. The two also worked together on the Nazimova production of
Camille, by which time they were romantically involved. They married on
May 13, 1922, in
Mexicali, Mexico. This resulted in Valentino being jailed for
bigamy since he had not been divorced for a full year (which was the law in
California at the time). He spent the night crying that Natacha was his legal wife and he should not be there. Days passed and his studio at the time,
Famous Players-Lasky, refused to post bail. Eventually, a few friends including June Mathis were able to post the cash bail.
Still having to wait the year or face the possibility of being arrested again, Natacha and Valentino lived in separate apartments in
New York City, each with their own roommates. In
1923, they legally remarried.
Many of Rudolph's friends did not like Rambova and found her controlling.
During his relationship with her, he lost many friends and business associates including June Mathis. Toward the end of their marriage, Rambova was banned from his sets by contract. One of the few people who supported her was a then-unknown actress named
Myrna Loy, whom she had discovered and had cast in the film
What Price Beauty? She said that Rambova was unfairly criticized. The end of the marriage was bitter, with Valentino bequeathing her one dollar in his will. The money and property he originally intended for her instead went to her Aunt Theresa whom they both adored. Despite popular rumors, Natacha was not a lesbian. She and Valentino had an active sexual life, attested to by many friends. Paul Ivano (their roommate through much of their dating) stated that one night, Valentino ran out in a panic thinking he had killed her during an all night session of love making; when in fact she had just passed out and was revived with cold water by Ivano.
Valentino's sexuality has been the subject of much speculation over the years. It has been suggested he was in
homosexual relationships with his roommates Paul Ivano and Douglas Gerrad; as well as Norman Kerry, openly gay
French actor Jacques Herbertot and Andre Daven. However, Ivano maintained that it was completely untrue and he himself as well as Valentino were
heterosexual. Herbertot's claims seem to be strictly fantasies (as no real proof backs them up) and Kerry, Daven and Gerrad were just friends. No real evidence exists to show Valentino had any romantic male relationships.Many of the rumors seem to stem from the company he kept; as many in his circle of friends were well known to have loose attitudes towards sexual experimentation.
Shortly before his death, Valentino was dating
Pola Negri. The relationship seemed to be to save his "great lover" reputation since his divorce from Rambova. Upon his death, Negri made a scene at his funeral, claiming they had been engaged. The engagement claim has never been proven. Many of Valentino's friends claimed that he had never gotten over the divorce from Rambova.
Valentino had no children though he did desperately want them (especially evident in his poem
Babies). He dreamed of having the traditional wife and mother, though he dated women who were quite the opposite (Acker and Rambova being
feminists with careers). One of the biggest issues of his and Rambova's marriage was her desire not to have children.
Nita Naldi a close friend, claimed Rambova illegally terminated up to three pregnancies while married to Valentino, though there is no way to verify this. Whether Naldi's story is true or not, Rambova was determined to remain childless.
Throughout his life, Valentino had a love of animals. He was an accomplished rider since boyhood, and owned several horses. He and Rambova spoke of opening a zoo and socialized with animal trainers. They had two
Great Danes, a large
gopher snake, and a
green monkey. From their trainer friend, Rambova purchased a lion cub named Zela for Rudolph. Rudolph loved Zela but eventually had to give her to a trainer outside of town when she bit a stranger who happened to be a
private eye hired by Jean Acker to prove the couple was cohabiting.
Valentino also loved to cook, especially simple dishes like spaghetti and meatballs. According to friends, his love of cooking was more intense than his romantic life.